Transferred. to hell.

boleh tak. i dysmenorrhea today. heavy flow. its like having Tom growling in my uterus and Jerry dalam my fallopian tube. kena dengan i balek pukul 3. tak tunggu, tak pandang belakang, i terus drive balek.

tapi sebelum tu. dalam locker room.

Sister Saodah datang. tapping my shoulder. "Markisa, i rasa you tak lama la sini"

hah dah kenapaa. heels i kah? kaler rambut i kah? x pasal kena fired neh. kena transfer pegi Hospital Gila Tampoi kah? yang lebih sesuai untok i? ke i naek jadik CNO (Chief Nursing Officer)? ke sister saodah mimpi i meninggal lagi 2-3 kali jumaat?

there's a lot of questions lingering in my mind made tu you know. dah la Sister Saodah cakap slow. sangat slow-mo, sampai dalam fractions of second tu i dah jadi paranoid.


"apsal Sister?"

i tengah tanggal sanggul lintang depan cermin locker. sambil-sambil tengok gambar koleksi-koleksi ex i dekat inner side of my locker door. ada 3 bekas jembalang sajork. lambang cinta sejati katanya. habis emua dah kena conteng muka. takda la jalang sangat i ni pun sebenanyaa kann. yang laen semua gambar channing tatum, mcdreamy, mcsteamy, kellan lutz, abang Thor, remy ishak, dan havang Redza, husband Irma Hasmie as my new collection. matilaa. hee

i love your abs. with all my heart.

"next august you'll be transferred" sister saodah cakap english bunyik jawa la.

"transfer mana la sister? i did apply for transfer. tiga tempat. emergency, daycare ngan cathlab. i dapat mana sister?"


"nah ko bace la sendirik" choyyy. tadi punya la saspen nak bagitahu. tepuk kepala karang.

i thanked sister. and she walk away. with jalan yang penoh attitude. i didn't noticed rambut dia serabai today. its like she just habis having sex with Dr Shiva. yang dia adore sangat tu. sebab muka macam Amitabh Bachan. bitch, please.


"Markisa Binti Ahmad Imran, hereby you'll be transferred to INTENSIVE CARE UNIT bla bla bla starting from 1st of September 2012".- simplified.

i was like. mintak lain, dapat lain. are you freaking kidding me? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING MEEEEEE?! ICU???!!!!

my dream of settling down, duduk lepak kat daycare, cathlab, balek from 9-5 hancur. i rasa nak hantuk kepala dekat locker. i should have stay je dekat ward without mintak transfer. tapi, sebab i classy, i takde la hantuk.

i called Marissa instead. lepastu i called Bulu. lepastu whatsapp Kavi.

semua cakap "You'll be fine"

fukimawati yaa yuols.

i called Ma. lepastu Pa jadik mangsa.

Ma suruh try dulu. suara Ma memang pengubat. sakit ape sekali pun sembuh. betul2 punca syurga.

nanti nak tanya HR. who's the asshole yang messed up with my application neh. dasar sabotaj.

i end up keluar from the hospital around 4pm. jalan jem yaa.


sesampai rumah. dengan uniform2, dengan socks2, i terus terjon tesembam atas my bed.

Cik Saerah tukar cadar takbest. she's our house keeper. dating daily to kemas rumah and everything. Ma do the cooking while she buat everything. but she didn't live with us. rumah dia dekat je.

cadar baru. miang sikit.
but then, i golek2. lelap terus.


Ma kejut. taruk kucing on my head.

"pukul berapa ni Maaaaaaa.." i yawned.

"6.30. jom pegi pasar malam. Ma malas masak malam ni. Pa suroh beli ayam goreng uncle bob la, char kueteow la, kuih akok laa.."

"motif kejot Kisa pakai kucing?" i ikat rambut. masuk2 mulut dah rambut.


"saja. i was thinking about a water spray. tapi i takot you suffocates. nanti tinggal Marissa sorang je anak Ma" selamba. "cepat sikit siap" she added. eleh. dia pun pakai baju kelawar lagi.

half an hour. is all i need.
takda la propa sangat nak dressed up. mandi. pakai baju. pasar malam je pun.

i grabbed my black legging. my pink gym tank top. and my black cardigan labuh.
period pain kurang. maybe i memang tak cukup rest.

...


end up borong macam2.

Pa balik. i showed him my transfer letter. he said "you'll be fine" too.

i end up biar je. malas nak fikir.
was watching insidious movie for kali ke berapa ntah.
Ma memang propa tutup2 muka dengan kain pelikat Pa. romantic hey? GET A ROOM!

Marissa tak balek lagi. hadup mati dia i tak tahu.
tapi macam biasa, twitternya jalan laju je. hidup lah tuu.




like really? ICU....
cane nak carik bf nehh...

husband-material. if you know what i mean. :p

love, MarkisaImran

The Sexual Harassment of Dato' Z: Part 3 - drastic end

i went for a manicure and pedicure today. sorang. dekat Lembah Tengah. i kerja syif malam. so petang-petang i tak kuasa la nak tidur dulu ke, melepek depan TV while doing nothing. my back hurts bila baring lama-lama.

i wore a skinny jeans. plain pink tees with some red stripes. my lovely gladiator flats. necklace Kay bagi. Marissa cuckup menyampah i pakai pendant tu. but it goes well with my hair. harini takmau ikat. i lepas je.

oh teringat Kay dah add i balek dekat Facebook. you're so immature. playing hide and seek yaa. i'm not interested in your game. so i campak dia dalam pending list. horny lah tu.

so yeah. pergi kedai cina biasa dekat 4th floor depan kedai Hinode.

"hai. i nak buat my nails. Margie ada?"

Margie tu filipinos. kerja bagus. bersih. tak macam jinjang2 yang ada. masing2 kuku syaithonnn panjang. i geli bleh? korek2 hidung, selet2 tahi berak pakai tisu ja. i tak boleh. eventhough i kerja buat benda-benda tu, tapi... ugh. u know what i mean.


"halo amoi. Margie takda. sulah balek firipin. lai la. i do you good oso meh"

tetau je amoi jinjang neh i takmau dia buat. ngan rambut karat dengan fringe. dengan piercing. dengan tank-tube. tapi tetek takda. aaaa shibuya-doll yang epic failed.

buat lah. i tutup mata je. cepat-cepat buat. cepat-cepat habis.

Auntie Chom kata nak datang malam ni. bawak cucu dia. Aunti Chom tu Ma punye elder sister. kaki cikpat. semua orang tak betul. soalan yang common bila jumpa i "bila nak kawen". i fakap. tu sebab i mintak Sister kerja syif malam ni. a sweet escape.

"amoi, mau buat color kuku tak? ada promotion hari ini ya"

i was thinking my period's gona end dalam 2-3 hari lagi. tak sempat nanti kena bleach pulak.

"takmau. polish je sampai kilat"

"fish spa takmau ah amoi?" dia tanya lagi.

"TAKMAU. geli." teros i bukak magazine. tak layan. semua nak promot pulak aihhh.

kuat bau colok. ngan telur pindang. ngan bau ginseng. i gesek hidung sampai merah-merah. i think my toner dah lari. nampak macam berpanau. i need to touch up later.

i dapat msg whatsapp from SN Kavi.

"hey babe. your dato' gatal dead oredy. Dr Killer killed him! with a lung biopsy!"

i was like.
innalillah?

maut datang tak kenal waktu. never terlambat. never tercepat.
dalam my mind, still teringat Dato' tu gulung2 misai dia sambil tengok i. lalu belakang i, siap bau2 rambut i. nightmare. banyak lagi. i takmau aib lebih.

i keluarkan a flattened dull smile. angkat bahu. roll my eyes.

then i pergi beli takoyaki dekat Jusco bawah. sesambil cuci mata tengok ah seng comel dekat booth kedai camera. hik.


MAAAAAAAAAROBBUKAAAAAA YAAA DATOKKKKKKK. GEDEBAKKKKK!!! bleh?


love, MarkisaImran.

The Sexual Harassment of Dato' Z: Part 2 - cobaan pertama

all depression has its root in self-pity.
and all self-pity is rooted in people taking themselves too seriously.

maaf lama tak nulis.
banyak kerja. komitmen. post-basic exam.
mungkin i kena transfer pergi ICU. hidup dalam private sector memang macam bola. kena tendang tanduk segala.

seminggu i tak naik ward. seminggu juga macam jumpa tak jumpa Marissa. balik rumah Ma dah tidur, keluar rumah, Ma dah keluar. Pa pun sama.

i feel older than my age. tengok cermin. ada kedut2 mata. and eye bags MasyaAllah. panda.

kerja emergency lagi harini.
naek ward to send some GL and stuffs.


i heard someone suwit2. you know how it sounds like kan? ala masa sekolah2 dulu macam tak pernah kena suwit2. ke you tak hot enough? hihi.

i toleh.

hamagad. Dato Z. tengah urut urut janggut.

"Hai misi. lama tak jumpa. i selalu turun bawah cari you. tak jumpa. mana pergi?"

SN Kavi pandang i yang tengah buat2 pekak. "shhh Kavi jangan sebok" i bisik.
Kavi senyum. putihnyaa gigi.

i senyum. tak reply.

"balik sabah yaa?" dato's tanya. elok je dia dudok dekat waiting lounge denga drip2 tu.

I BUKAN ORANG SABAH LA. i pinoy ja. BLEH.


"ada la datok. busy sikit" i jawab. dengan kening sebelah diangkat.

i nampak bodyguard dia ada dekat sebelah. pandang2. cucuk mata ngan needle 25G karang. takpasal.

tiba2 dato' jerit. dah kenapa plak kann. i tengok tangan dia bleed. branula tecabot.
i rasa dia saje2 cabot.

"misi! meh sini! tolong!" bodyguard dia panggil i suroh tengok. sama je gatal.


sorry i tak kerja sini. i kerja Emergency. BOLEH?

i panggel Kavi the Black Widow.

Dato' cebik bibir. sebab Kavi yang repair branula dia. ehh i tak kuasa la?




yes. Kavi cakap dia saja2 cabut. sebab nak suruh i datang dekat.
takpe. lain kali, i panggel Sister Saodah pasang branula baru. baru dia tau kenapa Sister Saodah kawen 3-4 kali.


dear Dato'. lung cancer dah merebak yaa. ingat2 kubur please.

i kerja double harini. nak makan kambing. nak nak. lambchops ya Marissa.